Today we have a guest post from Robyn Lindsay. Robyn was one of our contributors for the Leap into Love, and I am honored to share her raw and powerful post with you.
Have you ever sold your soul? I have.
I sold my soul as a teen when I gave my body over to boys who didn’t love me in hopes of them liking me.
I sold my soul during my first marriage in hopes of being the best wife and mom and daughter in law that ever walked the planet thankyouverymuch.
I sold my soul to a second husband because I thought he would be a good caregiver for me as I died from multiple sclerosis.
How did all the soul-selling turn out? Let’s see…
I was raped as a teenager, no doubt because I came across as “easy”.
After 12 years of marriage, my first husband told me he simply didn’t love me anymore. I didn’t speak to my ex in laws for years.
And I found out that I was MIS-diagnosed with MS, so I wasn’t dying and I was stuck with a terrible husband.
So, selling my soul worked out really great, huh?
I can pretty much guarantee you that it won’t work out any better for you. Yeah, I just said that. It will NOT work out better for you.
Selling your soul can only lead to painful experiences.
Yet, as women we so often do it. We don’t believe in our self worth. We feel like we have to bend, to morph, to change so that others will accept us. We go above and beyond, seeking the smallest morsel of acceptance.
Ever hear the phrase “seek and ye shall find”? Yeah, that totally applies here. If we seek the smallest morsel, then we get the smallest morsel. That easy.
So what would happen if we seek the highest amount of love and acceptance? That’s what we would get. But it has to start with us.
We must first give ourselves the highest amount of love and acceptance before we could possibly expect it from anyone else. This is no easy task, I know. We are taught from a very young age to give more than we expect.
Do me a favor. Re-read the 2nd section. See all those bad things that happened to me? Guess what? I am thankful for each and every one.
Yes, I have gratitude for all that crap because it formed me. It shaped who I am. I made it through the rape, the bad marriages, the horrible relationships, the medical scares. Each one strengthened me. Each one made me have to rebuild. Finally I learned to not look to others to complete me.
I could love myself and be whole.
Guess what happened after I started loving and valuing myself?
I created a life that I love. I met a wonderful man who would do anything for me. Together we have created a completely drama free home (I can breathe easy Every. Single. Day).
I found my life purpose. Family relationships improved.
All because I stopped selling my soul.
I challenge you to love yourself. Value yourself. Hold yourself in the highest regard.
Robyn Lindsey is a certified grief and empowerment coach living in the Pacific Northwest with the love of her life and two cats. She is a mom to three young men who are blazing their paths in this world.